


life preserver

by kiichu



Category: Zero Escape (Video Games)
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet Ending, Blood, F/M, Pining, Secret Santa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:34:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21976684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiichu/pseuds/kiichu
Summary: This timeline, Aoi finds himself paying a little more attention to Clover. Hopefully, it'll be enough to save her life.
Relationships: Clover Field/Kurashiki Aoi
Comments: 4
Kudos: 18
Collections: ZEcret Santa 2019





	life preserver

**Author's Note:**

  * For [timehopper](https://archiveofourown.org/users/timehopper/gifts).



> A bonus fic gift for Zecret Santa 2019. The prompt was "Santa falling for Clover during the Nonary Game".   
> It's not quite a happy fic, but I hope it at least gave some idea of a bittersweet outcome. ;) 
> 
> ALSO: I haven't played through 999 in forever, so some details on routes and whatnot may be inaccurate. Take it with a grain of salt.
> 
> Happy Holidays, everyone!

Aoi knows from the moment he’s sentenced to Door [4] that he is, in some capacity, going to die. 

Oh, there’s still a chance he’ll walk out of the game alive, of course - provided Snake goes batshit in the incinerator and takes Ace down with him - but Akane still dies. And if Akane dies, Aoi might as well be dead, too. 

So when Junpei asserts himself and chooses Door [5], Aoi feels a pang in his stomach. There’s not much he can do, though, apart from give a scoff or glare that lines up with his ‘punk’ persona. 

Junpei is so goddamn insistent on going through that door, and for _what_ ? Is the guy _that_ interested in seeing a dead body or something? If that’s the case, he should just look into Akane’s many envisioned outcomes; would he still be _curious_ to see the dead corpses of everyone in the room sprawled out in a lifeless heap, including _Junpei himself_? 

Somehow, Aoi doubts it. Knowing the truth about them, about Akane and Zero and the whole Nonary Game, will only destroy Junpei’s future - if he even has one in this timeline. Then again, Junpei’s trauma is Akane’s survival, so Aoi can’t give too much of a shit about it.

As Junpei makes his decision, Akane protests immediately, wanting to go with him. Aoi has to admit, she plays up the theatrics quite well; in another life, his sister might have been a movie star or something. She plays her role as ‘ _childhood friend returned/girl-next-door who still holds romantic feelings for the protagonist'_ quite well… though Aoi isn’t sure how much of that role is fabricated for her. 

Anyway, Akane tries her best to subtly discourage him, but Junpei still insists. Aoi huffs, crossing his arms, and forces himself to go along with it. There’s nothing he can do, and has to accept that this simply isn’t the future he and Akane are chasing. 

But this time, things feel a little different, and Aoi finds himself drawn to details he hasn’t been advised about before. Akane hasn’t mentioned anything like this, so he is almost positive he doesn’t do this in other outcomes.

This time, he notes Clover’s reaction to being separated from Snake, sees the sheer pain and panic settle into her green gaze, and it actually physically affects him. His heart pounds a little faster, palms get a little clammier, eyes a little wider; for some reason, he’s eerily aware of her distress, and it _bothers_ him.

And he actually thinks, consciously, _I understand what it’s like to worry about a sibling - I wish she didn’t look like that._

For someone whose only concern was his sister up until this very point in time, the reality strikes Aoi to his very core; the mere thought that someone else could potentially be more than a disposable pawn in Akane’s plans was startling.

But Clover’s arm goes to wrap around Snake’s, begging him not to leave her alone in this scary situation, and Aoi’s chest _twinges_. 

* * *

“Snake’s pretty smart,” he admits to Clover once they’re past Door [4] and he’s searching idly through a puzzle he helped design. “You’ll see him again, no worries.”

Clover sits quietly on the bed in the room, taking a breather; her hands ball into tiny fists in her lap, her shoulders shaking as she tries to collect herself. He watches her teeth sink into her bottom lip to try to force her emotions back. No doubt she’s reliving her past experiences with games like this, her mind racing with potential perpetrators as she tries desperately to determine who would want to kidnap her and her brother again. 

Aoi almost takes a second to sit with her, to once more remind her that Snake will definitely be fine (he can’t tell her, but fuck, he _dragged Hongou to Hell_ in one outcome!), but reminds himself Akane needs to be his top priority. He has to stay diligent, no matter how much his heart may soften at the sight of Clover’s held-back tears, or the way he wants to say something to stop her from trembling so badly. 

He considers, just briefly, giving her the bookmark and seeing if that would change the outcome - but Akane was very strict on when he had to give it to Junpei, and which paths would bring that opportunity. 

Clover’s sniffling breaks his thoughts for the moment. “Shut up, you don’t even know him,” she snaps, shooting him a glare. “But… you’re right, he’ll keep it together. I trust him.”

Giving a lopsided smirk, Aoi nods. “Dude seems like a badass - I wouldn’t want to get on his bad side.” _That’s an understatement, trust me._

“You’re not wrong,” Clover replies, surrendering a hint of a smile. Her gaze flickers down to her hands for a moment before looking back up at Aoi. “I’ll do whatever I can to protect him, as well.”

 _Believe me, I know that, too._ Aoi already knows all-too-well what happens when Clover has to _avenge_ her brother. He can’t say so, however, and just responds with a snarky, “I’ll bet.”

She rolls her eyes. “It’s a sibling thing. You know what I mean?”

He can read in between the lines here, can see she’s gently prodding him for personal information. Or maybe he’s being paranoid and she genuinely wants to know more about him - but he can’t take that chance. There’s too much at stake.

“Nope. Only child,” he replies, his voice clipped. 

“Oh.” Her face falls slightly; she draws her legs close to her chest and settles her head on her knees, looking almost disappointed. “Then I guess, in a weird way, you’re sorta lucky then.”

Aoi barks out bitter laughter at that. If only she knew - if only she understood how unlucky he really is, how much shit he’s had to go through just to secure the only other person he has in his life. If only he could tell Clover, could let her bear the weight of his hatred and his sins and his _grief_ \--

He stops laughing, and leaves the room without gracing her with a response.

* * *

It’s unfortunate, Aoi laments as he slings Snake’s unconscious body over his shoulder, that Akane saw it this way. He doesn’t understand why he’s suddenly so considerate of Clover’s feelings in all this, but it _really_ puts a fucking damper on the whole thing. He has to constantly remind himself that this is all for Akane, that Akane is the _most important person_ in his life, and that thinking about anyone else may as well be betrayal. 

Akane’s his _little sister_ , it’s his job to protect her. He can’t _afford_ to… 

Quickly, Aoi banishes the thought and finishes the switch-off with Snake and Nijisaki. It’s strange, but looking at the unconscious man slated to die leaves him no remorse. 

“Your boss’ll be the one killin’ you, dude. Sorry,” Aoi mutters to him, knowing he won’t get a response. It’s true, though - if Hongou didn’t get any stupid ideas like pushing people through doorways with active bombs in their stomachs, then Akane would have never had to add this part to the plan. If the asshole had just _confessed_ from the beginning, no one would’ve had to die.

But it’s too late now. Aoi doesn’t feel regret, but at the same time, he feels no pleasure at this, either - he’s just numb to it all. Nijisaki _will_ die, though, so that Snake doesn’t have to. 

(And that’s better for Clover.)

* * *

After Snake’s disappearance, Clover’s quiet suffering grinds into Aoi’s heart even further, like the tip of a boot digging into the ground. His breath catches in his throat and for a moment, he can only focus on the tears glistening behind her eyes, and how she seems to refuse to let them fall. 

He only half-listens to Ace’s insistence at ‘sacrificing himself’ - Akane’s told him about it a million times, and it’s honestly so bad, Aoi can practically taste the bullshit in his mouth. Nothing about the man looks or sounds trustworthy, but Aoi can at least recognize his own bias. There’s probably nothing suspicious about him to, say, Junpei - but most of the players should know better.

‘ _Should_ ’ being the key word, but…

Aoi glances at Clover for a moment, then back to Ace and his theatrics. There’s several timelines where the old bastard kills her, isn’t there? Briefly, he lets his mind wander into the possibility of preventing it…

If he can’t save Akane this timeline, or even himself - can he save Clover?

But _why_ would he even bother? What makes her so special in this timeline? Is there something specific that happens here, in this particular path, that sets her apart from the others? Does he get a better look at her tears, her worries, her grief, and that makes him want to protect her? 

_Should_ he protect her, even if there’s no change of fate for anyone else?

“Clover, uh,” he murmurs, approaching her quietly. She sits in a manner similar to how she had in Door [4] - all silent, hands in her lap, gaze looking dead and unfocused. In some timelines, this anxiety churns into a murderous rage - but hopefully, that won’t end up happening here. “How’re you holdin’ up?”

She glares at him, snapping her head in his direction and hissing, “How do you _think_?!”

Aoi knows it’s fear driving her actions and words - he’s so familiar with this brand of worry and pain that he immediately feels sickly comforted by its nostalgia. He stiffens, unsure how to respond (because he sure as fuck knows _he_ wouldn’t want to be messed with in this situation). 

So instead of saying anything, he just gives her a nod and leaves her alone, turning back to the others just in time to see Ace dramatically fall to the floor in his drug-induced act. 

* * *

Much later on, Junpei chooses Door [2] with Seven and Lotus, and Aoi becomes aware of what fate he’ll have. Granted, his choices from the beginning were fucked, so he should’ve expected this, but the tingling of the knife in his back already begins to spread across his shoulder blades.

(And of course, Ace is none the wiser - probably cooking up his stupid scheme on the spot.)

The plan is for ‘Santa’ and ‘June’ to go with Ace through Door [1], much to their secret dismay. Clover will wait for everyone to come back around to the main area after their respective puzzles. And it sucks, but no one but Ace will survive this part of the game - at least, that’s what’s supposed to happen. 

Akane had gone over what she’d called ‘main’ timelines she’d seen - probably the ones she knew had the most chances of happening. This part’s recurring, according to her: Ace grabs Aoi when his back is turned, ruthlessly stabs him, then grabs Clover. Then Akane runs, Ace corners and kills her in another room, and the asshole returns to the staircase with Aoi and Clover’s bodies and plays dead. It’s disgusting, it’s deceiving, it’s _evil_ \- but Aoi doesn’t think he can fight it. 

There’s no happy ending this time.

“This way,” Ace directs kindly, as if he’s _not_ about to slaughter them all. Akane exchanges a brief glance with Aoi and gives a small, almost imperceptible nod. It’s going to happen just as she foresaw, then.

Well, Aoi isn’t going to make it easy for him.

“Comin’ grandpa, sheesh. Who put you in charge?” he scoffs, shoving his hands into his pockets. “Tryin’ to sacrifice yourself earlier gets some brownie points, but it still doesn’t make you our leader or anythin’.” 

Ace’s eyes narrow, and Aoi can tell he wants to break character so very badly. _Go on, dickhead,_ Aoi thinks, _Show your true colors._

“I think it was very brave, albeit a bit reckless,” Akane chimes in, breaking the tension in the air a little. “I’m glad you’re alright, though, Ace. Don’t you agree, Clover?” She turns her head to the quiet girl.

Clover doesn’t respond, and continues to tremble as they grow closer to the staircase that will be their grave. Aoi reminds himself that she still doesn’t know whether Snake is alive or dead - and she’ll die never knowing. It feels like a pinch in his heart, a dull jabbing every time he looks and notes how _sad_ she is. 

And it’s _his_ fault she’s this way.

He wishes he could come clean right here, warn her about Ace’s attack, but finds himself bound by the promise he made Akane. He’d sworn never to break character and tell the truth until the very end - and only on the ‘right’ path. But this sucks, it sucks _so much_ that he can’t do anything to save her, or Akane and himself for that matter, that it physically pains him.

“Santa.” Clover’s whisper breaks him of any thoughts. 

He shifts his gaze to her as they walk, silently prompting her to continue - and she does.

“I’m scared for my brother. I want to see him again.” The agony in her voice is so raw, it tears him up that she won’t get her wish. “I know you said you were an only child, but… I feel like you understand, somehow. Or that you care. So… I just wanted to say thank you.” Through her pained expression, she curls her lips into a shaky smile, meeting his eyes.

And goddammit, something once more stabs into Aoi’s heart - figuratively, for now. 

“No biggie,” he replies, probably a bit softer than appropriate for his role. Oh well - they’re both about to die, what the fuck does it matter? 

The two of them start to speed up a little, creating a pretty convenient setup: Akane and Ace walk behind, Aoi and Clover ahead; besides being able to privately talk with Clover, Aoi has a step ahead of his sister and her would-be murderer. He has to glance back to see what the old man is doing, but also recognizes nothing will probably happen until they reach the staircase. 

He also trusts his sister with everything he has - including his life - and if there’s nothing else true about Akane, it’s that she’s strong enough to take care of herself.

So Aoi takes the opportunity to enjoy this last walk with Clover, his eyes settling on her pretty face. A touch of heat hits his cheeks and he reminds himself of the kind of character he’s playing - it won’t be very tough or punk if he starts blushing, will it? 

But his main focus is to keep the girl calm, so he continues their talk quietly. “If it means anything, I was serious about what I said before,” he says. “Snake seems tough enough. He won’t die that easily.”

He doesn’t miss the way Clover flinches at the word ‘die’ - and it _definitely_ feels like a punch in the gut to him - but she does find the courage to nod and stammer out, “Y-you’re right. H-he’s fine, I’m sure of it.”

“There you go.” Aoi gives a smirk and dares to nudge her shoulder. “Now stop worrying ‘bout it. As soon as we’re out of this next door, we’ll all regroup to look for him again.” 

Clover gives him a playful shove back. “Okay, sounds good. You promise?”

Before he realizes it, Aoi gets too caught up in his role, in keeping the pink-haired girl calm and positive - enough so that he completely forgets their fate. He opens his mouth to actually _promise_ Clover they’ll all look for Snake - but something stops the words from leaving.

They’ve reached the staircase - Aoi didn’t even realize he’d taken the first step already with Clover. Behind them, Ace and Akane have come to a halt, and the room settles into deathly still silence.

Aoi bites his lip and, understanding what’s about to happen, lets his instincts kick in.

Whatever the Aois of other timelines do, he dares to follow _his own_ heart in this very moment. Whatever role he plays elsewhere, steps he isn’t taking, outcome he’s creating -- none of that fucking matters right now. 

He looks to the girl beside him - as well as the one behind him - and realizes he doesn’t want anyone to die here.

“June, _RUN_!” He yells, turning around just in time to see Ace bring out the knife. Aoi’s leg kicks back into the old man’s shin as hard as he can, almost losing his balance on the staircase in the process. 

A lot of things happen at the same time: Clover cries out in surprise, Ace yelps ( _yelps!_ ) in pain, the knife clatters to the floor, and Akane bolts back the way they came. Aoi has to fight the urge to run after her, remembering that this isn’t the right timeline - that Akane will die regardless, and she _knows_ that. He can’t pretend to understand his sister at this very moment, but he hopes she isn’t too upset at him for trying to fight fate itself, hopes she _understands_ why he’s so compelled to do this. 

It isn’t fair for them to cause Clover so much pain, is it?

Ace staggers back, trying to regain his own balance, and Aoi wastes no time: he clutches Clover’s hand and attempts to run the only way they can: up the staircase. The girl has some crazy stupid heels on, so she almost trips a few times. But together, they manage to get a few rows up ahead of Ace. 

“Santa -- Santa, what are you _doing_?” Clover shrieks, glancing back and trying to process what’s happening. 

There’s no time to explain, and it isn’t like he can explain everything, anyway - so Aoi opts to just shout, “He’s gonna kill us unless we fucking _run_!” 

“K- _Kill_!?” Clover exclaims, once again looking back. “Crap! He’s coming!” 

Aoi glances over his shoulder, seeing the murderous glint in Hongou’s eyes. Damn it, that kick only seemed to piss him off further - is he going to stab them twice as hard now? In trying to prevent the bad outcome, did Aoi actually make it _worse_?

It wouldn’t be the first time something like that’s happened, at least.

“Come on, you old _fucker_ ,” Aoi goads, trying to calm his racing heart. There’s not much at stake for himself here, but…

But he’s decided: he wants to save Clover, this time.

“I’m a bit surprised you predicted my move, Santa,” Ace rumbles, his voice as dangerous as ever. “It’s a pity you won't be around much longer.”

 _Yeah? We’ll see about that._ Aoi keeps running up the stairs with Clover at his side, practically dragging her. Both of them are panting heavily, clearly not used to this much adrenaline use at once, but Ace takes his time walking up behind them. 

It’s as though he isn’t even worried about catching up to them - shit, he’s waiting for their energy to be spent, isn’t he? Like a wolf hunting rabbits, he’s waiting for them to be cornered or stop from exhaustion, and then he’ll strike.

Fuck, _why_ did Aoi think this was possible?

It feels like there’s a million stairs as they travel upwards, panting and gasping for air once they finally reach the top - and a familiar dark laugh echoes very close behind. 

“Stupid children. There’s nowhere you can possibly run that I won’t be able to find you.” His low growl is intimidating, sends Aoi’s mind momentarily back in time - back to that same voice giving instructions over a loudspeaker in a deathtrap. Back to this same psychopath taunting a _child_ behind the glass door of an incinerator, to the feeling of helplessness as Aoi gathers up his little sister’s ashes. 

Without thinking too much about it, Aoi grabs Clover’s shoulders and shuffles her ahead of him. “You have to go,” he murmurs quickly to her, “he’s lying - there’s a way out, and you’ll find it.”

The girl stumbles forward, turning around to protest, but her face goes pale before she can. A large shadow looms over Aoi, and it becomes very clear that it’s all over for him. Hongou must’ve gained some speed at the last moment, or was just very calculated with his movements, for he’s suddenly deathly close before Aoi can even think of a proper reaction. 

A large hand knots around Aoi’s scarf, yanking him backwards. As he’s spun around, the sharp end of a knife meets his abdomen, sliding in smoothly. Pain erupts in his stomach, his limbs trembling and twitching uncontrollably -- but Aoi dares to meet his attacker’s eyes. Hongou’s brown pupils are thinned in his crazed state, his lips stretched open to a wide smile with bared teeth. A dark chuckle rumbles in his throat as he twists the blade, and Aoi’s world briefly explodes into white. 

Aoi tries to speak, but liquid fills his mouth and he’s choking, suddenly all he can think is that he _needs air_ but there’s no air, there’s only his own blood. Then, the very next moment, it spews out through his mouth down his chin, onto Hongou’s coat ( _good_ ), and unfortunately onto those awesome shoes Aoi does genuinely love.

He looks for Clover, hopes she managed to scramble up the rest of the stairs and is running for her life - but she stands nearby in shock, a hand outstretched in his direction. Why doesn’t she understand - he’s as good as dead anyway (and has been since Door [5]), but _she_ still has a chance.

So _why_ isn’t she taking it?!

“Gg… g---o,” he gurgles, trying to get the sounds past the bubbling copper taste in his throat. “Snn- sn-… ake…. off..offin.”

 _Please, Clover. Please understand what I’m fucking saying!_ He begs her mentally, his eyes growing dull as his vision starts to fade at the edges. But he does catch her lips mouthing the word ‘ _coffin?_ ’ and he gives a trembling nod in affirmation.

_Yes! Find the coffin. Snake’s in there. Please - find him, and survive._

The next moment, he hears the clicking of her heels as she runs away, her quiet cries fading off into the distance. He gives a brief smile, pleased that he was able to give her an ounce of hope in this nightmare he helped set up.

Aoi can’t have his sibling after all this is over, but at least Clover can.

But a cold realization hits Aoi once the knife’s finally wrenched out of him: She’ll know. Red soaks through the white of his shirt, pooling freely onto the floor below him; the pain is unbearable, unspeakable, _unstoppable_ \- but he can’t help but focus on that one blinding thought echoing through his mind. 

Clover will know the truth when she gets to the coffin.

Once she reaches that coffin and finds her brother alive, she’ll connect the dots. She’ll realize that Aoi knew where Snake was because _he was the one who put him there_. It’ll all come so clearly to her, and Aoi can only hope that his gesture of letting her know holds _some_ amount of an apology, somewhere. 

He isn’t sure if he’s truly sorry for doing what Akane said had to happen, but he is sorry for getting people like Clover wrapped up in all of it. 

All sounds drown out and the world grows darker and darker, his limbs feeling heavy and numb. Before he can register what’s happening, his knees have hit the ground, and his torso soon after. Staring at Ace’s boots, Aoi gathers up the last of his strength to spit forward a wad of blood, smirking in triumph as he hits his mark. 

Hongou hisses something angrily, but Aoi can’t even be bothered to process the words in his brain. It isn’t worth it - whatever this monster has to say to him, it can wait until they’re both in Hell. 

As one of his last breaths leave him, Aoi at least has the clarity to wish Clover’s far enough away now, that she’s going to be safe and make it out okay.

It’s stupid to think, but maybe this timeline, this path, this outcome… maybe he actually managed to do something right. He’ll never know for certain, but perhaps he was finally able to keep a pair of siblings together?

And although it’s one of the four things he hates more than anything in this world, he finds himself attached to that **_hope_ ** for Clover’s safety - like he’s actually aboard a sinking ship, and someone’s finally tossed him a life preserver. Sure, the preserver’s crumbling and slippery - maybe it’s been used too many times, or taken advantage of by others - but he holds on with all he has, and will continue to desperately cling to it, even as he drowns.


End file.
